As a husband begins to meet his wife’s top five needs, her response is usually that of bountiful respect and love. In caring for her needs, the husband shows his love and devotion towards her, an absolute necessity in the heart of every woman. He in turn gets the respect he desires. Without the fulfillment of her needs, a woman has difficulty showing the respect and admiration her husband needs.
Most of women’s needs stem around attention from her husband. I am amazed at the small amount of quality time many couples share. The more time you spend talking, laughing, doing activities you mutually enjoy, discussing spiritual ideas, sharing family time, fulfilling each others needs, and praying together, the stronger your love will become and will continue to grow. (Turn off your cell phones and televisions for the utmost quality time.)
When most men think of dying to their SELF and putting their wife’s needs ahead of their own, they immediately picture a terrorist showing up at the door and threatening the life of their wife. The husband would gallantly jump in front and say, “Take me instead!”
In reality, dying to your SELF, according to my husband, is when I ask him to go to the mall with me in the middle of a Florida State football game. Going with me would be dying to his SELF. He would rather face the terrorist.
Women, for the most part, seem to have an easier time supplying their husband’s needs. A natural act for most women, we desire to nurture others and take care of their needs.
The one area that sometimes gets complicated is sex. Most women, at one time or other in their marriage, tend to control the frequency of lovemaking. They forget to take into consideration the needs of their husband.
In the other extreme, when the woman continually performs sexually without any gratification, she begins to distance herself and resent the act. The husband needs to also consider the needs of his wife for a mutually satisfying love life.
The bottom line is that we need to continuously keep our spouses needs ahead of ours, ahead of our SELF. When we supply the top needs of our spouse, they in turn will desire to take care of our top needs. It's a wonderful circle of harmony that blesses the marriage relationship.