Showing posts from January, 2015

More on 'Self'

 Self is the biggest stumbling block to every marriage and the major problem in failing relationships.  How do we apply selflessness in our marital relationship? Oftentimes, our personality interferes with our desire to be selfless. Some people naturally inhabit a selfless attitude, while others may top the charts of selfishness. Unfortunately, it seems that the most selfish people are unaware of this flaw in their character. To the world, though, selfishness can sometimes look admirable to others. It may take a conscious effort to begin to put your spouse ahead of yourself. Think of the arguments that would cease if you learned to resist the temptation to have your own way. Isn’t that what arguments are usually about? Does it feel good to get your own way? It may initially, but there is usually a price to pay for selfishness. It goes back to taking your thoughts captive. When those selfish thoughts begin to command your attention, stop them. Ask God for His help. YOU can

The "S" in GPS

The “S” in GPS stands for “self.” Put your spouse ahead of yourself.   Aside from including God in your marriage, selflessness is the most important factor for a healthy marriage. In Christian circles, self is a “four-letter word.” We are called to give up ourselves to follow the will of God. Our marriage relationship, ideally, should parallel our relationship with God. In fact, at some point, I believe they will actually intertwine when nurtured correctly.   Hence, we should always put our spouses ahead of ourselves. According to the world, though, self should rank number one in our priorities. Self looks out for its own interests and welfare. Oftentimes, our own interests include overindulging in fleshly desires. Addiction is a raging problem with alcohol, drugs, sex, computers, and anything else that comes before our relationship with our spouse or God.  Many people are obese because of excessive food intake. We are in the midst of a failing economy because of our greed f

The "P" in GPS

The “P” in GPS stands for “Pray.”   Pray with your spouse at least once every day.   Praying keeps God in the center of your marriage and is the key to a successful, healthy marriage (the marriage that God intends for you). When Rick and I went through our marriage crisis, the turning point for us came when he took my hand in his, and we turned our marriage over to God in prayer. God literally melted away all the pain, anger, indiscretions and mistakes we made – I mean MELTED them away! It was amazing! We have kept the habit of praying together – every day. Through it, we turn every issue we face that day, no matter how big or small, over to God before it can become an insurmountable problem. Five seconds into a prayer and we forget what we might have been angry about.  Prayer between two people joined as one in the eyes of God is very powerful!  If you aren’t yet comfortable praying out loud with someone else, here is a sample to get you started.  Remember, prayer is ju

A New Beginning

Happy New Year!  Another new year with a fresh slate ahead for wonderful adventures to be had!  We get a new beginning! This year will start with my new book coming out in a few weeks - “GPS to a Joyful Marriage.”  This book has been in the making for a number of years.  It is a short, easy to read book that gives you biblical tools to help a troubled marriage and to help maintain a healthy marriage.  It is comprised of information that Rick and I have gathered over the years, from counseling couples and holding seminars, which we believe to be the core of a successful marriage based on biblical principles. Now that I’m on a purposeful track to expand my marriage ministry with my husband, I plan to get back to marriage articles on this blog.  I have strayed a bit and gone off into other tangents.  Thank you for your patience – those of you who have come seeking marriage advice to only find words about food!  This blog has been around for almost six years and actually started w