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Showing posts from October, 2012

What About The Children?

As you start out your day today, please remember to pray for all the people in the northeast affected by the hurricane.  I pray it doesn’t become the storm that’s predicted.  I’m grateful to have my mom here, who returned with me from Pennsylvania, and my brother from Delaware, but I still have lots of family in Pennsylvania and friends all over the northeast.  My thoughts and prayers are with all of you. One of the major difficulties we encounter with couples we counsel is that of step-children.  Second marriages bring baggage that not only includes unresolved relationship issues, but also the burden of resistant children and families.  Second marriages fail mostly because of the inability to blend two families together.  Children can form an insurmountable wall between couples that most people don’t know how to tear down. The bond between a mother and her children is so powerful, th a t sometimes, even a biological father can feel left out.  A non-biological father ofte

God and Marriage

I apologize for my lateness with my article.  I’ve been in Pennsylvania since last Wednesday helping my mother prepare to move to Florida, and I also attended my nieces wedding.  I had limited internet access all week and was unable to get to any WiFi on Sunday.  I spent Monday driving and then sat in a hotel Monday night in Georgia trying to finish this before my mind gave out.  How can sitting in a car all day be so exhausting? Okay, I was unable to finish in the hotel – my brain cells would not focus enough.  I’m back in Florida now and finally completing this.  It is so wonderful to be home!  There is so much truth to the old adage “There’s no place like home.”  Thank you Dorothy! Back to marriage: God created marriage to be a holy union between a man and a woman; a union not meant to be separated.  He did that so we would have a partner to share our lives, so we would not be alone.  He meant for us to have someone to help us and complete us.  We come together as two separ

Why Marry? Part 2

Not too long ago, when I was just a teenager, people that lived together without the blessing of marriage were frowned upon – unaccepted by society.   Not many couples did it.  Now, it has become the norm.   Today, 70 – 90 % of young people will live with someone of the opposite sex (in a relationship) before they marry.  It is understandable that the younger generation fears marriage when 50% (almost 60% in Florida) of them come from broken homes.  Even baby boomers, that have experienced divorce, are now moving in with their partners to live out of wedlock.  Many of them have no intentions of marrying.  There is also a trend among people over seventy, who have lost spouses to death, to forego marriage and “live in sin”.  They can’t afford to give up their departed spouses’ retirement and social security benefits to marry. At one time, it was believed that living together, first, would damage your chances for a successful marriage.  Now, it seems, that couples who li

Why Marry?

Marriage is hard – maybe the most difficult part of our lives we’ll ever have to deal with.  Although parenting, at times, may run a close second, we would never think of divorcing our children out of our lives.  We love them unconditionally, much like God loves us. So why don’t we go into marriage with the same attitude?  Our spouses should mean more to us than our own children – according to the Bible.  Matthew 19:4-6 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife and the two will become one flesh.  So they are no longer two, but one.  Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.” NOTHING should come between a husband and wife; man should not separate them.  God never mentions that about our relationships with our children.  We’re only given them for a season, and then they are expected to move on and become their own person – the person God created, not us.  Our spouse should stay with us for life. Marriage was in

The State of Marriage

I’m a little late getting this out today.  I actually slept in this morning - a sorely needed sleep. (Pun intended – my body is also crying out in pain.)  Rick and I spent the weekend in Panama City painting, cleaning and fixing our house that was destroyed by renters.  A couple of hired hands were supposed to help us, but they never showed up.  I’m somewhat disturbed with the human race after this weekend, as you may see reflected a bit in this article. THE STATE OF MARRIAGE My soul weeps when I look at the state of marriage in our society.  The devil has been very triumphant in destroying the values in our society by silently chipping away at the foundation of our success – the family. Divorce in a family devastates confidence, esteem, trust, and love – just a few of the consequences of the breakdown of the family.  This lower sense of worth leads children of divorce to drugs, alcohol, abuse, pregnancy and crime, to name a few.  My heart aches when I hear, over and over