Marriage 101 Continued

As of today, I will only post articles on Mondays for awhile.

Rick and I watched an interesting show yesterday. I believe it was called “Boot Camp for Tough Love.” Interesting. Unmarried couples, (mostly dysfunctional ones of course), were invited to attend this boot camp for seven weeks. At the end, they would either break up or become engaged. They were invited to leave if they didn't want to make that decision in the end.

My fascination insisted I sit through an hour of it.  I surprisingly find myself, someone who dislikes reality shows,  wanting to tune in again just to see how the host will handle these couples.

The host of the show was amazingly brutal with these couples, pulling no punches and openly pointing out the flaws in each relationship. Most couples were deeply offended.

I thought the whole program a bit silly until the host separated the men from the women and each entered a room with tuxes for the men and bridal gowns for the women. They were told, “If you are ready to marry your significant other today, pick out your tux or wedding dress.” Of course they did not know what their girlfriend or boyfriend would choose.

The moment of truth came, in front of all the other couples and some invited guests, as the “groom” (with or without tux) waited to see if his girlfriend would enter sporting a wedding dress or not. You can imagine the surprise and emotions. They then had to openly share their feelings about the situation. The host looked to see a sign of commitment from both.  It was a very powerful moment for each of these relationships.

While this show might be considered a bit overboard, it certainly weeds out the couples who should and shouldn’t marry. As someone who has been on the musical end of the wedding business for a long time, I’ve watched many couples marry that I questioned their decision to join as one.

I realize we could avoid a lot of divorce (in a perfect world) if people only married for the right reasons. Marriage goes beyond right or wrong, though. I truly believe that a couple, regardless of their circumstances in marrying, can make a marriage work if they have commitment and the desire to love.  Even more so, God in the center of a marriage is the sure key for success.

I did hear some words of wisdom from the host of this show. He said that love is a verb. That is what we too easily forget in marriage. It is so much more than a feeling; love needs to be an action. The best way to show that action is to commit to a marriage, through better or worse, and know you will stay with it until ‘death do you part’.

That is what we need to pass on to young couples, newlyweds, and even couples who’ve been married a long time but haven’t figured it out. Please help me spread the word!

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