As I prepared to post this, I was reminded that I planned to continue with The Vision for Your Marriage. I will go back to that next week as I feel compelled to share this article with you.
Okay, I know I promised to stick with marriage talk, but I can’t ignore the affect that nutrition has on our lives and our relationships. It’s become a great passion of mine, so bear with me – it can also affect your marriage relationship.
I have mentioned before about the evil of sugar to my system. It causes depression in me. I usually stay away from it, but when I’m out of my routine, around company and friends, or away for a few days, I sometimes succumb to the lure of that sweet poison. A little bit will not usually bother me, but it’s abstaining from that ‘just one more’ that I find difficult. Sugar is a drug to me, and I am an addict. One bite and I am hooked.
Last week I had a few days of my ‘funk’-- sugar induced from a week of family visiting. I am not the best person to be around during those days, at least for my husband. I can usually hide it very well from outsiders but can’t seem to function inside the confines of my home. I lose all motivation and can’t get anything done. I feel overwhelmed and unable to perform all the work I should be doing. I don’t particularly want to be around people, and I find fault in everything Rick does. I blame him, too, for any difficult circumstance that I struggle with.
After the fog lifted, I thought about all the people in the world who suffer from depression and are prescribed mind-altering drugs to help their moods. All the while, it may likely be from the food they eat – sugar being the main culprit. (Too much of some other foods will do this to me, also.) Meanwhile, all the people taking drugs for depression then have to deal with side effects and never get to the core of their problems. They fall into a vicious cycle of dealing with depression that rarely ends. If this could be you, please consider the role too much sugar or any other foods might be playing in your life.
I then pondered why God allows me to wallow in this pit of despair and loathing when I desperately cry out to Him for help. More than anything, though, I felt disappointed, as I always do whenever I come out of one of these funks. Disappointed that I’m not faithful enough to stay strong and overcome it.
And then God started showing me the truth of the matter. It has nothing to do with faith or lack of it. I know what sugar does to me, but yet, I made the CHOICE to indulge in its temptation. The desires of my flesh overtook the reality of what it does to me. I am no different than an alcoholic, or drug addict, or gambler, or anyone with an issue that rules their flesh.
When we make the choice to indulge in things that we know are not good for us, we are disabling God from helping us through the consequences. Why would He pull me out of the depths of self-pity when I let go of His hand and jumped in the miry pit -- by choice?
Why would God heal a drug addict or alcoholic from the hangovers or relationship destroying behavior when they continue to coddle the bottle or the pills?
I think about obese people going to the altar and crying out to God to heal them of their diabetes, or cancer, or heart issues. They have disabled His help. They have made the choice to indulge in the fleshly desire of eating to the point of gluttony.
God won’t help us as long as we continue to turn to our fleshly desires instead of Him. He will help us overcome those desires, but we cross the line when we expect Him to heal us of the consequences of our disobedience.
How many of our struggles are caused by consequences of our disobedience?
We certainly carry this attitude into our marriages. We may be asking God to change our spouse, help them to act more loving, or show them how to control their tongue. But what are we doing that may be causing these consequences of our own actions and words? We may be disabling God to help us in our marriage because we are indulging in the fleshly desire of self.
When our marriage is all about “me, me, me” and not about putting our spouses needs ahead of our own, we are choosing to not follow the will of God for our marriage. We are choosing to indulge in our selfish desires. God will not help us until we make the choice to follow His plan for our lives and become obedient to Him and His Word.
Have you been stuck in a situation where you feel like God is not there for you? Is your marriage in a rut you can’t seem to get out of? Take time to look at the cause of your issues. Is there sin involved or disobedience to God? If so, it may be time to change your behavior or your thinking and let go of that which pulls you away from the God who created you. In His eyes – that is the ultimate sin, and He rarely brings consequential healing to it.
Proverbs 3:1-3 “My son, do not forget my teaching, but keep my commands in your heart, for they will prolong your life many years and bring you prosperity. Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart. Then you will win favor and a good name…vs. 7-8 Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord and shun evil. This will bring health to your body and nourishment to your bones.”