GPS to a Joyful Marriage

For this week’s blogpost, I want to share an article about forgiveness by Joyce Meyer. Making a Decision to Forgive When someone hurts us, we often react as though that individual has stolen from us.  We feel that they owe us, yet God wants us to let it go.  If we refuse to forgive, what hope do we have of receiving what we need? To receive from God what He has promised in His Word, we must obey Him, regardless of how difficult it may be.  We must forgive. The greatest deception that Satan has perpetuated in the area of forgiveness is the idea that if our feelings have not changed, we have not truly forgiven.  When you decide to forgive someone, don't let the devil convince you that because you still have the same feelings, you have not really forgiven the person.  You can make the right decision to forgive and not "feel" any differently.  That's when faith steps in. You have done your part, now wait on God.  He will do His part and heal ...

I’ve been discussing the word “love” which in the English language, covers the whole spectrum of feelings from candy to marriage. But in the Greek language, there are five words for love that majestically express the various levels of the true meaning for this word. I previously discussed epithumia and eros , and will look at the other three Greek words for love  – philia, storge, and agape love. Philia or phileo is a love that represents the love towards a friend.  We find a committed love for family, friends and community which also requires values, familiarity and equality.  Philia is about companionship, mutual affection and partnership.  This form of love should also apply to our spouse because we need to be friends with each other to experience a successful marriage. Storge is an affectionate love as towards a parent or your child.  It is the love of family, a commitment that holds regardless of any stress in a relationship.  “Blood is thic...

What is love, really?  We LOVE Oprah, we LOVE ice cream, we LOVE our spouse.  We live in a world where love is fleeting, focused on objects that come and go in our lives. If we no longer like something Oprah says, we turn on another talk show host. We live in a world where marriage, too, has become disposable.  When that initial “exciting” love disappears, it must be time for a new relationship. This is NOT the love that God intended for marriage.  He tells us to stick in there - “’Til death us do part.”   So how, in this world, do we do that?  One day at a time. I believe our initial “falling in love” starts out as a feeling.  It often makes no sense.  We seem to have little control over it and become completely infatuated with the other person.  When everything falls in place and we believe we have found our ‘soul mate’, (God’s way of attracting our interest), we rapidly plunge into exhilarating emotions. They entice us to pursue and ...

Sadly, I believe our world has strayed from the true meaning of God’s plan for marriage.  We have turned into a “me” centered society that looks out only for its selfish desires, and that attitude has seeped into the holy institution of marriage.  We only want to be ‘happily married.’ Did God give us marriage for our own happiness, or did He intend it to teach us how to draw closer to Him?  If you’re looking strictly for happiness ( and they lived happily ever after…) , you will not survive the brutal desert we often trek through in a marriage relationship.  If you follow the path God plans for marriage, though, the joy and happiness will follow. I’ve always said that our marriage relationship closely parallels our relationship with God.  In both, we need to sacrifice “self” and put the plans of God and needs of our spouse ahead of our own.  I’ve come to realize, though, that those paths should be intertwined, traveled together as one.  They are ...

Many of us are not born into the world with a Bible in our hands and parents who lovingly lead us to God.  We have to experience the world first and make the decision if we will follow the ways of the world or the ways of the cross.  Few are brought up in a true Christian home that shelters them from the ways of the world, while teaching them fulfillment in the hands of God. I think of an associate pastor at one of the churches we attended, whom we used to jokingly say, was saved from the womb.  He lived a sheltered life and always had God in it, thanks to his loving parents.  He’s a wonderful person but not the first person you would think to go to for help in a truly difficult situation.  His world experience is limited. That’s not to say he isn’t a wonderful Christian and pastor, he just wasn’t called to go witness to drug users or alcoholics or adulterers.  Most of us have to go through unimaginable trials before we turn our lives to God....

Do you ever wonder what this life is all about?  Why are we here?  What is our purpose?  God put each and every one of us here for a reason.  The key is to discover that reason, your purpose on Earth.  Until we do, life will seem worthless, crowded with unfulfilling business.  Not knowing God’s purpose for you brings frustration in your faith and in your walk with Him. I’m always surprised at the few people in a church congregation who truly know what their God-given purpose is.  I believe this is a crucial part of our existence.  How do we live a life without a plan from the God who created us, who put us here strictly to complete that plan?  It will be a life of dissatisfaction, discontentment and displeasure.   John Bevere says that when we face the judgment day, we are not going to be judged on how many souls we’ve won, rather on how well we’ve completed the plan God gave us for our life. We are not put on Earth to sa...

So you’ve been through serious difficulties in your marriage and have struggled to forgive.  You don’t know that you truly love your spouse anymore.  The state of marriage can be overwhelming during these times, so what do you do? First of all, you need to make sure that you’ve forgiven your spouse for any wrong that may have clouded your feelings of love.  Remember, forgiveness is a choice - one you need to make every time you’re reminded of indiscretions against you.  You can’t move on to a healthy marriage until you forgive, as God forgave you. As for falling out of love, let me tell you how God returned my love for my husband back to me. I thought I had fallen completely out of love with my husband when we went through our marriage crisis.  My friends at the time told me I shouldn’t stay in my marriage if I didn’t love him anymore.  (If you have friends that tell you this, they are not your friends.  I suggest you find new ones.) ...